Am I dumb or am I dumber
I have a dual personality syndrome I guess, times when I am just plain stupid and then the other times when I am comfortably dumb. It's a no contest, I am the most stupid person in the world when I set my mind to it.
In my previous post I contested those who say that school is cruel on children. Today I concede on certain grounds. There were days when school makes you feel like burying your head under the sand.
One such day was when R exposed my stupidity in a way that even Bluebeard would consider cruel on an 8 year old. He was a couple of years older than me, R ie, not Bluebeard. His parents had enrolled him in school late or something. Or I was enrolled early. Anyway, what happened was that I'd forgotten my sketchpens for the afternoon drawing class. R told me that he'd give me his as he was taking a half day. I was probably too grateful, so grateful that I did not even question him when, during lunch when the children were out playing, he took out the sketchpens not from his bag but from D's bag and asked me to use them. I kinda knew that a trick was being played on me but my primitive mind could not comprehend the magnitude of it. Or probably my mind is just an illusion.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, you can guess what happened. D was my seat neighbour and she screamed when she saw me using her sketchpens during the drawing class. My teacher caned me and I was left branded a thief.
I suck, don't I? Picture this. A couple of years pass by and you'd expect what my father used to say 'some sense' in me. An ample display of the futility of the expectation was when school decided to give us a surprise half day. It surprised me, no doubt, so much so that my brain went dead and I went off to fly kites with A, expecting to be back in school by 3 when my mom would come to pick up my dada and me. My mom doesn't work, or that day might as well have been a half day for the entire family. Technically that is.
The only excuse I have for my thickness is that my brain goes dead occasionally. And when it does that, it does so in two ways. Sometimes everything gets dizzy and I find it hard to stand. At other times I chose to be oblivious to things that are painfully obvious. I am still suffering, predominantly from the second type of brain damage. You could say you could be not stupid if you chose to be (or not to be). But the fact is wherever I get the option I would definitely be stupid. For me there is no choice.
In my previous post I contested those who say that school is cruel on children. Today I concede on certain grounds. There were days when school makes you feel like burying your head under the sand.
One such day was when R exposed my stupidity in a way that even Bluebeard would consider cruel on an 8 year old. He was a couple of years older than me, R ie, not Bluebeard. His parents had enrolled him in school late or something. Or I was enrolled early. Anyway, what happened was that I'd forgotten my sketchpens for the afternoon drawing class. R told me that he'd give me his as he was taking a half day. I was probably too grateful, so grateful that I did not even question him when, during lunch when the children were out playing, he took out the sketchpens not from his bag but from D's bag and asked me to use them. I kinda knew that a trick was being played on me but my primitive mind could not comprehend the magnitude of it. Or probably my mind is just an illusion.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, you can guess what happened. D was my seat neighbour and she screamed when she saw me using her sketchpens during the drawing class. My teacher caned me and I was left branded a thief.
I suck, don't I? Picture this. A couple of years pass by and you'd expect what my father used to say 'some sense' in me. An ample display of the futility of the expectation was when school decided to give us a surprise half day. It surprised me, no doubt, so much so that my brain went dead and I went off to fly kites with A, expecting to be back in school by 3 when my mom would come to pick up my dada and me. My mom doesn't work, or that day might as well have been a half day for the entire family. Technically that is.
The only excuse I have for my thickness is that my brain goes dead occasionally. And when it does that, it does so in two ways. Sometimes everything gets dizzy and I find it hard to stand. At other times I chose to be oblivious to things that are painfully obvious. I am still suffering, predominantly from the second type of brain damage. You could say you could be not stupid if you chose to be (or not to be). But the fact is wherever I get the option I would definitely be stupid. For me there is no choice.
posted by Sameer Sarma at 5:59 PM
4 Comments:
Look... nothing can be as bad as having shat in your pants(literally), while class is going on...ok ?
er... that was my comment ok sam ?... Jen
sam, what are u studying in the university? eng. lit? was only wondering what the youth in shillong are upto these days...maybe u could shed some light!
radhika, I don't stay in Shillong anymore. Left it close to 9 years back. I'm in the dark as well, though I went there this year and found that the campus was renovated.
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